Many years ago, my daughter and I took a very hard-core self defense class. This is one in which you learned to maim/kill potential attackers with a pencil, an umbrella, or whatever you had on hand. (My daughter was written up in local papers for using a Barbie doll as a lethal weapon.) This was a book recommended by the 5'4 (female) instructor with multiple black-belts in various martial art disciplines, and also teaches corporations/military personnel on how to keep top executives safe, not just in the US, but throughout the world, in hostile zones. The idea is not to be Rambo, or a martial arts hero; which 99.9% of either male or females cannot accomplish without years of training. This book is meant to teach you to listen to your inner "warning bells" -- if something doesn't seem right: Don't go there; don't do that. Get security to escort you to your vehicle, whether it's a hotel or the post office. If there's too many people on your portion of the sidewalk, cross the street. It also teaches you to recognize warning signs -- AKA: "the helpful guy" - if you're in a new place, and someone wants to help you carry up some bags, kindly decline, and close the frigging apartment door. If he lives there, he will have a key; if he's a guest, his friend will buzz him in; otherwise, he's stalking you, or someone else in the building. This is an excellent book when you realize the actual world we live in. It was especially written with females in mind, to take advantage of your "fear" because you're probably right when you feel it. Most women have an exceptional sense when something is not right. Don't ignore it.Read full review
I wish I could give a copy of this book to everyone I know who has been the target of manipulative behavior, harassing behavior, a stalker and/or a dangerously angry person. Gavin De Becker breaks down and dissects the subtle manipulative behaviors to watch for, and how to handle them. He also identifies the behaviors that can be warning signs of danger and what to do. It's also a very engaging read. It doesn't matter whether you are a timid, agreeable person or a confident, assertive person, you will learn a better way to handle difficult people from this book (and you may find you've been doing it wrong).
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I bought this book on the recommendation of an instructor at the State Department's Diplomatic Security Anti-Terrorism Course (DSAC). I wasn't sure what to expect, but the book is quite good, and written in an engaging way, through a series of stories, tied together to make the main points the author wants to get across: that fear is a natural and important human reaction, that provides us with useful information. It's important not to ignore the fear, but to embrace it, and act on it, just as our instincts tell us to act on it. The author believes the knowledge he shares can save your life, and while that claim is often made on book jackets, this claim has a lot of human history and psychology going for it.
This book has not only helped me to understand why violence can occur the way it does and why I respond to things the way I do, but it has put a name to so many "odd" behaviors. I understand now why I sometimes feel creeped out by someone that I just met, I can pinpoint what it is that's creepy about them. I also use Pre-Incident Indicators to teach others about how to spot suspicious situations. Gavin De Becker has contributed greatly to the world of self-defense. The Gift of fear is well-written, easy to read, practical and straight forward. I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn more about how to keep themselves and those around them safe. I have purchased numerous copies to use as gifts. I will probably be purchasing more copies in the future.
I bought this book because I saw the author, Gavin DeBecker, on a talk show. The subject was a brief discussion regarding how our instincts work to warn us when we are in danger. The Gift of Fear went into this in more detail and gave practical information regarding evaluating threats, etc. The suggestions are practical and easy to implement. This book is not trying to scare us into living in constant fear, but instead seeks to keep us from living in constant fear. The author is successful in conveying that we should not live in constant fear and includes many examples of how to evaluate warning signs. Usually I take my time reading informational books, but this one was so interesting I didn't want to put it down. I have loaned this book to two friends who work in law enforcement. Both thought it was accurate and practical.Read full review
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